Fostering The Love In Kansas

Celebrating Thanksgiving is always the time to reflect on all the things in our lives we're grateful for. Being a parent, there is always something we're grateful for. Our kids, their health, our health(ish), the love we have in our lives. But what I never thought about being grateful for was the "YES". I've always been someone that makes changes quickly. I make decisions quickly and sometimes even without much thought. But when it comes to big, life-changing, decisions I agonize over them, ask everyone their opinion, agonize some more, etc. But ultimately, I already knew what the answer was - deep down in my gut. The idea to start fostering came to me one day and it wasn't even discussed with anyone. I reached out to our local agency and asked for information. I said YES the minute they asked if I wanted to attend classes. No hesitation. When I started fostering, my plan was always to get an older child. I didn’t want a baby. I didn’t want diaper...

As Little Man has gotten older, his personality has developed but so has his differences. I don't even know how to explain Little Man to some people so I gave him a label early on. Autism...he's autistic...please be kind to him, he is autistic. It was easier to explain.  And while it wasn't official, it was still a way to explain him to people.  Because I felt like I had to explain him...prepare people for him. It is also used as a warning and I hated that. No one should be warned about Little Man. He doesn't need a warning label but in reality, he does. It helps people feel more comfortable around him because he is different. He makes noises or says things that are different and make people uncomfortable. He repeats things and often times doesn't acknowledge anyone else - he lives in his own world. A few weeks ago we started the process of getting an official autism diagnosis. It's not something I need to know but it is needed for him and his future.  His...

Approval is a funny thing.  I don't want to think I need anyone's approval to live my life but in the foster world, approval is everything. And in adoption, there are so many things that require approval that day to day life is never normal. Approval for taking him out of state, approval to enroll him in sports, approval to get him on meds. In adoption, approval is everything.  We have to do a home study, negotiate subsidies, get approval and then start legal proceedings. In my state, adoptive resources have to go through a BIS (Best Interest Staffing) with the agency and DCF in order to be approved to adopt the child.  They look over the facts of the case, the length of time the child has been in placement, the needs of the child, and the overall stability of the adoptive resource. Today I was informed today that I was approved to adopt Little Man.  Little Man is going to be mine. We are getting closer and closer...