Fostering The Love In Kansas

This morning started off just like any other day.  I woke up, I got the boys up, I started the process of getting everyone ready and out the door.  Nothing different.  Except Little Man decided to pee on the couch instead of getting up and going to the bathroom. Not the end of the world. It happens to the best of us but this morning it just set off a chain of events in my head that resulted in me putting myself in timeout.  I sent myself to my room, closed the door, and cried a little. After he peed, instead of asking the "why" because I knew the answer would be "I don't know", I sent him to the bathroom and sprayed the couch down.  This isn't the first time someone has peed on the couch. Diapers/pull-ups leak, no one's fault. But this morning, Little Man had already taken his pull-up off and just chose to not get back up and go pee. I gently reminded him he needs to use the toilet and not just pee. I could see him starting to shut down so I left a...

When you have bio children, if one falls and hurts themselves, you kiss their boo boo and go on with your day. In foster care, we have so many regulations and people watching us.  There are so many things we have to document, we have to share, we have to watch. Even before 8 am today, first blood was drawn.  Mr. T slipped and fell face first.  Busting his lip from the inside.  Mouth full of blood and lots of tears. This has become a very frequent occurrence with Mr. T as he is learning to walk and run and just be a boy. Normal parents wouldn't have a huge amount of anxiety around this type of accident.  But with foster parents, there is documentation, fear of investigation, and even as far as fear of having kids removed. Mr. T was removed from a foster home due to excessive critical incidents before being placed with me and so I have more anxiety than normal due to this.  I probably watch him much closer than I do Little Man.  And I watch Littl...

So, I know it's normal for kids to get hurt.  It's not unusual for them to fall down and hurt themselves. I get that....but what I have a hard time with it that seems to happen more often for Little Man than I would like.  And it's not really happening a lot with him, I just don't want him hurting. The Friday after Thanksgiving, Little Man was hopping all over the couch.  He was amped up and was trying to get "doggy" to play with him.  As soon as I said "be careful", he nose dived off the couch and hit the corner of the coffee table.  Effectively putting a very neat hole in his cheek. He usually is very "tough" and just needs a kiss to make it better.  But the screams and tears were just so heartbreaking.  I grabbed him and went to the bathroom to get a better look.  He was starting to really bleed at that point so I think I totally lost my shit then. I feel like I am a fairly calm person under pressure. I don't react, I tend to l...