Fostering The Love In Kansas

Back in October, it was determined that permanency was going to be extended until January.  It's now a little less than a month until then and what I had assumed was going to happen has not. When I worked at the agency, I knew what I would have done as the worker to make sure Little Man went home as close to the court date in January (within means and barring any issues). His social worker was chastised for not being consistent with transportation and visits.  So, naturally I assumed visits would happen more frequently and over Christmas break, we would start overnights. Visits started more frequently but are less consistent than before.  He hasn't seen his siblings or mother in a month. Most of the visits were the ones I would drive him there and back because his worker would forget to put in transport. Last visit was supposed to be a long one but the worker decided to change it to a short one because she messed up transport again. That was the last one we had....

While I'm going to go over our day, the last bit of our day is what I am on cloud 9 with.  As I've said before, being a foster parent means that I have to be run through the wringer at least once a month.  Today was a day of meetings, walk throughs and appointments. Little Man woke up in a good mood and was in an even better mood that he didn't have to go to school.  What started as a good mood morphed into an amped up 5-year-old. When Little Man has an audience, he definitely likes to put on a show and today he had a massive audience. The morning started with not one, not two but three women in our home checking on him.  His caseworker, my caseworker and his therapist.  These monthly visits consist of him showing them all his toys, his bedroom and sometimes his underwear. What it's supposed to consist of, is to make sure he is safe (checking that my medicines are locked up, there are no knives in his bed, and he isn't living in the shed in the backyard)...

9/25/2015 So after a very long night of no sleep and many many tears....I got a call around 2:45 this afternoon, telling me that Little Man is staying. Apparently the kinship family thought Little Man was in a group home. When they found out he was in a foster home, they asked if it would be a good idea if he was moved and Little Man's worker told them she thought he was doing well with me. So the kinship home decided to not take him.  I am so happy that his worker felt strongly enough to tell them that she thought it was a bad idea to move him and that he was doing so well with me. I also found out that the bio mom is no longer allowed access to the kids.  I wasn't told why and I can't ask.  Visitation will most likely be moved to every other week because the grandfather isn't able to get off work every week and he's the one that's been making the visitations lately. Little Man asks about his siblings on a regular basis.  But the last visitation, when h...

So I'd like to say that I had a naked male in my house all weekend and we did wicked things but what I really mean is a toddler that somehow found new ways to exhaust me.... My 5-year-old came to me not potty trained.  Yes, 5-years-old....it has been a battle because he really likes wearing diapers.  And I believe that sitting on the toilet was used as punishment because he would scream bloody murder when I first asked him to sit on the potty. I don't think he is not intelligent enough to get on board with potty training, but I just think he's lazy and hasn't been truly motivated to use the toilet. I've read quite a few websites, magazine articles, and books and most of them say to take the diapers away along with the clothes and just let them learn to ask to use the potty. Meaning...you don't leave the house because your toddler is buck-ass naked. I'm serious...I had a naked 5-year-old running around my house like he had invented the concept of being na...

9/20/2015 I've really had to think hard about what to write about the first home visit.  I have a lot of thoughts going around in my head and I didn't want to verbally vomit all over this blog the day it happened so I've had some time to think about it. Friday the 18th Little Man's worker and my worker came to the house.  This will happen once a month until the end of god damn time. The point of this is to make sure I don't have him locked up or am using him to create couture clothing in a sweatshop.  Of course, while they were there he decides to have a complete meltdown and I had to put him in timeout. Little Man loves pretty girls.  Besides my friend Fi, he was flirting and hanging all over his worker. I think part of it is because she's there when there is visitation with his mom and siblings but also because he sees a pretty young girl (that's code for someone he can manipulate).  Well, apparently he tried to hit her when he took her into his ro...