Potty Training

So I'd like to say that I had a naked male in my house all weekend and we did wicked things but what I really mean is a toddler that somehow found new ways to exhaust me....

My 5-year-old came to me not potty trained.  Yes, 5-years-old....it has been a battle because he really likes wearing diapers.  And I believe that sitting on the toilet was used as punishment because he would scream bloody murder when I first asked him to sit on the potty. I don't think he is not intelligent enough to get on board with potty training, but I just think he's lazy and hasn't been truly motivated to use the toilet.

I've read quite a few websites, magazine articles, and books and most of them say to take the diapers away along with the clothes and just let them learn to ask to use the potty. Meaning...you don't leave the house because your toddler is buck-ass naked. I'm serious...I had a naked 5-year-old running around my house like he had invented the concept of being naked.

"Look at me...I'm NUK-KED"  "NUK-KED" being yelled at the top of his lungs...for two days...

What they don't tell you is the sheer amount of piss that you will have to deal with.

Little Man was not daunted by the thought of being naked.  He peed on the carpet, he peed on the linoleum, he peed on me and he peed on the toilet.

Towards the end of the weekend, he was starting to dance a bit before a few drops came and we rushed to the toilet.  I think he started to understand the concept. But the big thing is we had NO POOPY diapers.  He pooped on the toilet like a champ.

I don't know that I can even make you understand how excited, happy, proud, tearful, etc I was when he took a substantial shit on the toilet.  We both did a touchdown dance, high-fived and put so many stickers on his potty chart that you can't see the date anymore.  He screamed "BIG POOPY" for like 2 hours....and I couldn't even be mad.


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