Today

I talked about you today....for like the millionth, hundredth, billionth time.  I talked to a room full of people about why I wanted to be your mommy.

Don't get me wrong, I wanted to be anyone's mommy.  But now, after 614 days, I want to be YOUR mommy.

The venue - Liberty Hall in Lawrence, KS

I talked about how hard it was to come to terms with not being a mother.  How I didn't feel like I fit into a preconceived notion of what a mother was.

And the whole time, I saw your crooked smile...your floppy hair that is starting to look suspiciously like a mullet...the way you look at me out of the corner of your eye when you are picking your nose....

And I told them how smart you were and how big you are getting.  I think they could hear the pride in my voice when I talked about how funny you are and how nice you look when you dress yourself.

Today I talked about how much I struggle to wear the title Mommy with you but you never struggle to call me Mommy. I am your mommy and I am so happy you chose me.

The only struggle I had today was the painful but fabulous dress I wore.  I had no struggle to end my talk with how much I love being YOUR mommy.

Painful but it had POCKETS!!!

Foster care is hard.  It is thankless, painful, and sometimes maddening....but I will forever be thankful that it gave me you.

Some day, I hope to be able to tell you about the time I talked in front of a few hundred people about you.  To be able to explain to you why I did it....because you are worth fighting for, you are worth showing off, you are worth talking about.

Because, if nothing else, Listen To Your Mother about how wonderful you are and you'll never have to question it.