Hold onto your pants....
Hold on folks...this is going to be a long and bumpy post....and I'm trying to not write this with too much anger. But I'll fail miserably.
Tonight I received a call from my KVC worker letting me know that her director contacted her to tell her to have me take my blog down. She made some mild accusations that I had his name on it (which I don't) and that there was his likeness up (which I have always made sure his face was covered). They are grasping at straws.
They didn't like that I was interviewed by the news, but I never said anything negative about them. They don't like that I'm blogging about my experiences, although I've never been negative about them. But you can bet that I will not be so kind in the future when I talk about them.
My immediate, knee-jerk reaction, was to tell them to suck it. I am not one for being told to do something...I know that this is bullying and I do not like to be bullied.
The problem is, I was also told by my worker that there have been instances (a lot of them) where people are punished for standing up to upper management at KVC and DCF. Punishment in the form of lost jobs, blacklisted and children removed from foster families care.
I do not want to lose Little Man. I do not want him moved to a home that is known to be bad for children. I don't want to be investigated for abuse because someone anonymously reports me to DCF. These are all things that can be done to me if I don't play right.
But I am so, unbelievably angry about this. First, it's my first amendment right to express myself. I have the right to document this journey and both the positive and negatives. I have this right. And I'll be damned if I'm going to be bullied into doing something that I know is wrong wrong wrong.
Yet, here I am. I am giving in. I'm angry at myself for giving in, for not fighting. But I can't lose Little Man. I just can't. I've worked so hard to get where I am with him and if he had to start over, it would be so harmful to him. Let them come after me but leave him out of it. But the way politics in Kansas is going lately, it's all about them not the children. It's never about the children.
Tonight I received a call from my KVC worker letting me know that her director contacted her to tell her to have me take my blog down. She made some mild accusations that I had his name on it (which I don't) and that there was his likeness up (which I have always made sure his face was covered). They are grasping at straws.
They didn't like that I was interviewed by the news, but I never said anything negative about them. They don't like that I'm blogging about my experiences, although I've never been negative about them. But you can bet that I will not be so kind in the future when I talk about them.
My immediate, knee-jerk reaction, was to tell them to suck it. I am not one for being told to do something...I know that this is bullying and I do not like to be bullied.
The problem is, I was also told by my worker that there have been instances (a lot of them) where people are punished for standing up to upper management at KVC and DCF. Punishment in the form of lost jobs, blacklisted and children removed from foster families care.
I do not want to lose Little Man. I do not want him moved to a home that is known to be bad for children. I don't want to be investigated for abuse because someone anonymously reports me to DCF. These are all things that can be done to me if I don't play right.
But I am so, unbelievably angry about this. First, it's my first amendment right to express myself. I have the right to document this journey and both the positive and negatives. I have this right. And I'll be damned if I'm going to be bullied into doing something that I know is wrong wrong wrong.
Yet, here I am. I am giving in. I'm angry at myself for giving in, for not fighting. But I can't lose Little Man. I just can't. I've worked so hard to get where I am with him and if he had to start over, it would be so harmful to him. Let them come after me but leave him out of it. But the way politics in Kansas is going lately, it's all about them not the children. It's never about the children.
This hurts my heart. You are so good, Shan.
ReplyDeleteI think you've done the right thing to privatize your blog (and keep your Little Man), if that's how they're going to play. They are apparently unable to realize what a positive impact you're making with your blog/chronicling your journey. Keep up the good work (as a mom and as a blogger). You are doing a very good thing.
ReplyDelete